November 21, 2007 5:19 pm AEST — By Long Zheng

The A-Team strikes Zegoe

LOLCat cease and desist

As you all know, this blog is only a cover-up for a very large Chinese piracy operation which is why it is the latest target of the Microsoft A-Team. Because this website has such wide reach and implications, it is an obvious target compared to the more amateurish activities such as factory-based software counterfeiting operations in South East Asia.

Today, I received a cease and desist letter from Seed IP Law Group PLLC acting on behalf of the Microsoft Corporation in regards to one of Microsoft®’s most cherished intellectual properties, Zegoe®. Filled “LOLs”, “OMGs” and smiley faces (they copy & pasted all the user comments), the document demanded the “immediate cease and desist of advertising, promoting, and assisting the unauthorized distribution of Microsoft®’s ZEGOE® font software”. If I fail to comply I risk becoming “accountable for additional damages to Microsoft®”. Since I don’t really want to risk national security if Zegoe® falls into the hands of terrorist – who knows what destructive yet beautifully readable weapons of mass destruction® they could create, I had no choice than to comply, thus I have removed all the links.

However as a precaution for future legal implications, I ask everyone including myself to obfuscate any references to legally sensitive material in LOLCat speak. For example if you need to express the need for a particular ZIP file, instead of “please send file to this@email.com”, you would say “DO WANT. Plez send bucket to this@email.com kthxbai”. Besides making court hearings (if it should arise) entirely hilarious – “I plead I R not cheezburglar”, it also acts as a deterrent for any cat-hating lawyers.

Finally, I have consulted with my lawyer, albeit imaginary but well practiced, and we intend to sue Microsoft back for murder to the second degree of my hyperlinks. We suspect the murder may be racially motivated.

Microsoft, Windows, Zune, Zegoe, A-Team and the Zune logo are trademarks of Microsoft Corporation in the United States, other countries, or pretty much anywhere where people exists really. Weapons of mass destruction is a trademark of the United States Government in the United States, duh.

39 comments

  1. icow says:

    can I haz a zeegoez?

  2. Long Zheng says:

    A bit more subtle.

  3. Brandon says:

    I can haz the goods?

  4. Chad says:

    I really didn’t think MS cared. You are promoting thier shit. Well, that blows.

  5. n-blue says:

    Oh, I already has a copy–then? LOL

  6. Long Zheng says:

    Brandon’s got the hang of it :D

  7. Demens says:

    Imagined Microsoft quotation that popped up in my head after reading this post: “Noooooo they be stealin’ my Bucket”

  8. milan says:

    i love the small print at the end :D

  9. Aidil says:

    Lolz can I see teh deceased eh?

    :)

  10. wojtekmaj says:

    Ha-ha they are blocking illegal Zegoe copies, but they can’t block illegal copies of Windows… ;d Long, how you dare to expose Microsoft to loosing millions of dollars ;d

    PS. Sorry for my english.
    PS2. Email me for get your unauthorized copy of Microsoft®’s ZEGOE® font software ;) kontakt (A) wmdesign.pl

  11. Zim says:

    Dis post wuz hiarious. Y they try 2 stop u if nywayay we can find it thru terrentz?

  12. Jason Cox says:

    Hey Long, if you’d like I can send you a letter “on behalf of Microsoft Corporation” asking you to put the fonts back up.

  13. Long Zheng says:

    @Jason Cox: May the power of attorney be with you.

  14. dj_cityboy says:

    ah dude, thats lame….i cant believe M$ puts up such a stick over this trivial crap!!

    pretty sad when they wont let “your average consumer” promote there goods!!

    kthxbai!

    peas
    cityboy

  15. Fire says:

    If anything, this will only cause more people to be interested. BTW, Google Cache is your friend. ;)

  16. tino says:

    Fantastic! Finally Microsoft has learned something from Apple! ;)

  17. Bob says:

    Another example of MSFT being too stupid to differentiate between friend and foe. A simple call from the local office could have solved it. That’s what you do with friends.

  18. Zim says:

    @Bob: Do they has frenz?!

  19. Ryan says:

    IM SURE IT WUZ JUS TEH LEGAL DEPARTMENT BEAN STOOPID. 2 IMPROOOV UR LOLCAT LANGUAGE, USE DIS: http://speaklolcat.com/

  20. Me says:

    DO NOT take a look here
    http://www.google.com.ar/search?q=istartedsomething+zegoe
    and DO NOT click in “Cache”

    Bye

  21. Edo says:

    teh rapidsharez link wuz delletd anywayz

  22. Sadly this is a little ironic after the recent posts about Apple’s Public Relations.

  23. Albert says:

    Whoa…I thought our potential was Microsoft’s passion? I guess not…

    Anyway, would anybody be nice enough to pass the burger? I would like a bite…

  24. Drew says:

    DOAN U FINKZ DIS AR TEH LOAD OV BULLSHIT? RLY, SURELY THAZ TEH LEAST OV THEIR WORRIEZ. BUT IT CUD BE DAT U CUD PAS IT ON 2 TERRORISTS, WHICH WUD HARM TEH SECURITY OV THEIR FONTS.

  25. Mike says:

    Hey Dude,

    Kudos for your humerous, yet balanced reaction. So many bloggers get all high and mighty when faced with this sort of stuff.

    Lawyers in any large corporation don’t really have any room to move on infringements like this, however minor. They can’t really “just give you a friendly call” as one of the comments above suggested. The only real option is a C&D, which is always going to sound over-the-top & threatening. But, hey, you dealt with it really well. I don’t think you would have lost any friends at MS over that.

  26. Morten says:

    There ares one companies who wont benefit for this, and that’s Microshit.

  27. Drew Smith says:

    Very funny, and interesting about how microsoft is so protective about five branding fonts. so stupid, i can understand if it is giving a link to a free windows vista copy.

    oh well. see you people

  28. Keff says:

    I should sue microsoft for using my comment under that post to threaten you, I didn’t give them rioght to do that.

    Just in case MS is going to sue you again and include comments:

    Yeah man, wherez da Zegoe?

    ———————- Comments end here ———————-

    We, Microsoft company, officially declare ourselves a bunch of assoles, and cancel everyting which was written in this letter before and after the marked lines.
    As our apology for being assholes, we offer free licence to every piece of software Microsoft has ever prodeced and will produce in the future, and a free Zune 80 to Long Zheng and every “reader” of his blog. “Reader” is defined as a person who have visited istartedsomething.com website at least once in his life.

    ——————- Our invalid bullshit starts here ———–

  29. quikboy says:

    Microsoft made a mistake, again.

    Long Zheng is a promoter of some of Microsoft’s good stuff, and they pull this kind of stunt on him?

    That’s really sad and evil of you Microsoft. He pretty much advertised a nice set of fonts.

    Microsoft is the one that really suffers in the end.

  30. Farmers untied says:

    You really can’t complain. You got away with posting links to all those (non free) mp3s on the Zune site.

  31. Greg says:

    MICROSOFT FINKZ THEY OWN TEH WURLD, I OWN THEM!

    LONG-ZHENG FOREVR!

  32. Arun Kumar says:

    heya Long, why no updates for the last 4 days? i hope u r doing fine :) i love this blog.. so keep rockin dude :)

  33. Henry says:

    Ok now the bunny is dead now what?

  34. David says:

    I R VOTE THAT AWL HOO DOWNLOADED T3H FONTZ HOSTZ THEM SUMWHERE AND PLASTER LINKZ AWL OVER DIGG.

    I know, I suck at LOLCat speak.

  35. Stephen says:

    Excellent means of posting about this, Long! I seriously laughed my ass off. I remember when MS did the same thing to us when UX.Evolutions was up and running. Oh well. At least you are witty enough to post about it like you did… But in all seriousness, how could you NOT see that your promoting of zee Zegoe font obviously implied that you harbor terrorists!? [Napoleon Dynamite] GOD. [/Napoleon Dynamite]

  36. Ryan says:

    Even after more than a year, this is very interesting…considering Microsoft themselves have had issues with the distribution of Segoe (they didn’t make it, and it seemed based on Frutiger).

  37. Mark says:

    DO WANT Zegoez fntz. Plez send bucket to mark@likeyoulike.net kthxbai

  38. I FOUND THE Zegoe Collection says:

    i found the font

    suprisingly its on a Skydrive account

    if obscured my name

    heres the link

    http://preview.tinyurl.com/24dxq9b

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